transister.social

i bet at least one of you pervs is totally into phone cuckolding

Trying to decide which is worse, showing up for a date in a Tesla or opening convo with your hogwarts house. Maybe the later because the former provides an opportunity for vandalism

best part about owning left handed scissors is when a right hander picks them up without knowing, gets mad and disgusted and shouts “what the fuck is wrong with these scissors”

my internal “I’ll watch one of her videos” to “oh she is trans look at her cute blahaj I will now autistically watch everything on repeat” pipeline is real and boytubers I like should probably do some estrogen just in case your girl here can hook u up

imo there should be girl kissing me rn

“Tenth anniversary music video?? The song is THAT old?!”

posted 12 years ago

“oh no im dead now”

I’m a coffee hipster
https://youtu.be/BfNoNTjcRbE

also why is this man so attractive and handsome and is he 25 or 50 years old

“Yeah his wife cheated on him so he divorced her and moved to Texas. Which seems like an overreaction I mean can’t he just cut bangs like the rest of us?”

• Girl who has to be talked out of getting bangs every time a partner abandons her

The lady taking my order at McDonald’s was named Celeste and I literally paused and gasped and said oh my god I love that name and also a large coke please

30 minutes until my landlord does a walkthrough and decides if this cute innocent lil tranny can renew her lease wish me luck he doesn’t know I have tits fyi

AFAB sounds like a cute compliment and AMAB sounds like I’m about to go hunt a white whale

being a bottom with a restrictive eating disorder is weird because normally I am all about putting things inside of me

local men not docile and deferential? turn any man into a 🥺 boi with this ONE WEIRD TRICK!

And the sky is lookin kinda cloudy
so maybe you should stay inside
and you and I can get a little rowdy

FUCK IT, Christmas tree

someone suggested my day planner is inappropriate for work and it's like just let me be gay ffs

“Why do you use the lowercase g when you write your name Ginny?”

because the capital g feels like it has been debased by google maybe

I was chatting up the grocery store clerk and he (politely) asks “hey why do you still wear a mask?” and so I say “do you think the medical field cares about or for people who look like me?”

And since he was a Black man he thought a second, nodded his head and said “real”

welp i filed a federal EEOC and state human rights violation complaint against my employer, ill let you know if those are still real things in today’s society (I have low to no expectations from the federal commission ngl)

I wanna cut my hair short but first I need someone ready to hold me while I cry because I cut my hair